night is when i relax
when i think up all of the good thoughts
relentlessly, and unabashedly
it is at night
when i am able to be real
when i am able to use unsavory wording
when i am able to show a risque photo of me
only to
delete it all by morning
screaming
frustration
clawing
forgetting
sweating
unsure
misused & abused
loitering in ones’ own conscience
biting irony
sex is always on the table
when you’re making pretty sense
lay back down
calm
warmth
dread
dream deeply now
what is appropriate to write
on a blog
that you feel obliged
to write appropriately
such as
properly structured poetry and poise
I just want to say
that I am unbalanced
and that
I don’t feel like getting my hands dirty right now
with making art
so instead I make my mind dirty
writing the visceral moments from which tainted thoughts protrude rudely
Quintessential
barbed wires intertwine around my ankle
I try to pull away and such but
fruitlessness is evident
It seems as though I am caught
in this frightening trap
Time is the only friend I have left
that will tell me when it ends
Only then relief will kiss my feet
only then rest and slumber deep
tell me what I want to hear
and dress it up in bows
tell me what I want to hear
things no one else would know
tell me I can do no wrong
and fill me up with pride
tell me why this world is flawed
let that one wrong slide
tell me what I want to hear
I’ll rid the waste with no appeal
eat four square meal
brand the cow
and walk the dog
slay the hog
if you would only just tell me
what I want to hear
please hurry
I am in such haste
the cows are coming home
we’ve got empty dinner plates
Sally’s teeth are falling out
and Benny’s cheques are bouncing
Timmy has run out of pills
bedridden Mother so demanding
so
tell me
tell me
tell me
please
if you want to save yourself
and everyone you love
you will tell me what I want to fucking hear
and all of the above
brittle gum 